End of Days

Another month down.  And by way of farewell, April, I give you Super Meat Boy.

Not sure why he popped into my head.  I didn't play the game too much, but I thoroughly enjoyed it.  As frustrating and infuriating as it was, I somehow found it rather amusing when I continually died and had to keep replaying the same level over and over and over again.  Not sure why, but there I'd be, just laughing to myself "whoop, have to do it again--for the 90th time."
Anyway.  Surprise surprise I have NO idea what I'm going to do for May.  But rest assured I will have something by the end of the day tomorrow.

The bent pig

Post-Its got squashed in my bag.  Oops.

Bird

Magic 8 Ball

Will I get free donuts tomorrow morning before work?

shake shake shake

Damn.  Every time.

More portraiture

I went to a concert tonight and confirmed yet again that I do not like concerts.  Not that it was a bad show.  I think it was a perfectly good show.  And I like the band.  I just don't like concerts.
Anyway.  On the bus ride back Peter and I managed to sit directly in front of someone who "in his honest opinion" did not like the show at all.  This man was a douche.  This is his portrait.

To clarify: he was not a douche because he didn't like the show.  He was a douche because he was douche.

Lingerie

I've got a Victoria's Secret gift card for $10 that's been sitting on my desk for a while now.  On the front is a woman in bra and underwear up against a wall with a look of...I don't know really.  I have a hard time imagining a situation where this expression would be necessary or even appropriate.  Mainly because I'm not sure what she's trying to convey (apart from the need for the card holder to own underwear like hers). 
"I'm having so much fun against this wall I could have sex with you."
That's the best I can come up with. 

I went ahead and took her out of the scenario, what with her baffling body language and all, and drew for you the bra and underwear she modeled.  Voila.  Please visit your nearest Victoria's Secret to purchase your own immediately.

Meta Post-It

Don't look at me like that.  We all knew it was coming eventually.  How bout we all just thank whomever I didn't draw a post-it on the first drawn post-it, huh?

As Promised

One drawing of the teenage son from the show Dinosaurs on whom I had a crush when I was young.  (Just for you, Tyler.)

Work really wore me out today and I considered doing a simple stick figure version of "Robbie."  Here is that drawing for your viewing pleasure.

MIND BLOWING

A drawing.  Of an origami fox.
I'll let that sink in.




And then BLAMMO.

I am fond of the word poop.

Variation on a Theme

Otherwise known as, The One That's Not a Vagina.

Blogger made this one sideways, but maybe it's better that way.  Maybe then it's less obvious that I simply drew some lines around the word 'poop.'

1 minute Post-it

Whoops.  Completely forgot about this until about ten minutes ago.

I did something like this for an art class once, though on a bigger piece of paper. 
Does it look like a vagina?  I didn't mean for it to, but now I sort of see it. 
I'm tired.

I do not habitually use drugs.

Though I always seem to have that look around the eyes.  I have of late not gotten loads of sleep.  That may have something to do with it.
* I was looking at this again and decided I wanted to use the other picture of this Post-It.  The one that doesn't have my junkie looking eyes.

Much better.  Now you can't see how tired I am.  You can instead just know that I am very very tired.

More hands

But this time it's not mine.

BLAH

Yep.  This is it.

I did not forget

I deliberately chose to wait to post til this morning because I was tired upon getting home last night.  I am still tired now as I've been up since about 4:30 which was when my nephew decided he was going to wake up.  So, earlier than I expected but still tardy, here is my post-it for the 15th.

This is a map.  The bold(ish) line was my path from Quincy Marketplace to Fajitas and 'Ritas.  Clearly, this is an important map.  Equally clear should be its accuracy.
For a much more interesting discussion on maps pertaining to Boston, I recommend you explore Bostonography.  It's pretty neat.

What's the deal with the thumbs?

I copied out the text of a previously-written blurb (I wouldn't call it a story) and then smudged it with my thumb.  To be fair, this time I used my right thumb.

On the subject of thumbs

3 x 1

BLAMMO.

In.  Your.  Face.

Portraiture

My friend Mark recently drew some portraits of myself and a couple others on a napkin without looking at what he was drawing.  In honor of him, I offer this portrait of my nephew.

I don't see the point in including an actual photo of my nephew since this is a pretty accurate depiction, and I am nothing if not vehemently anti-redundancy.

Boredom to the Max

Take one nickel.  Like so.

Trace the nickel with pencil.  A lot.  Like so.

Before you know it, you've killed 15, maybe 20 minutes of your night at work.  Amazing.

Dear Franklin Park Zoo:

I understand you are looking for a new Administrative Assistant in your Animal Management Department.  I would like to be considered for this position.
While I majored in English and minored in Linguistics, I once took a zoology class in high school and really enjoyed it.  I also took Molecular Biology, Anatomy and Physiology, Chemistry, Forensics, Physics and then did an independent study of Anatomy and Physiology my senior year wherein I cataloged all the muscles in the human body and then constructed those that could feasibly be constructed out of clay and attached them to a foot high model skeleton.  For a good long while Jurassic Park was my favorite movie.  In short: I dig the sciences.  Not only that, but I retained that information.  Not all of it, but a lot of it.
BAM.

Know what that is?  Of course you do.  You're a zoo.  But the point is: so do I.  That's a platyhelminthes, baby.  Sure I had to check the spelling, but I've never forgotten that word.  How can you?  (Answer: you can forget it if you're a dumb lame person like all the other people applying to this job who aren't me.)  Platyhelminthes = flatworms. 
Here's a couple more taxonomically awesome words I'll throw out:
Nematode = round worms
Cephalopods = the cool animals AKA octopi, squid, nautilus, and cuttlefish
Chordata = the vertebrates
And I've got loads more (not really).  Know what else I've got loads more of?  Enthusiasm for this job.  So at your earliest convenience I will be ready to accept an offer. 
Thank you for your consideration.
Sincerely,
K. Bliss

Lindsay No-hands

Anyone seen I Know Who Killed Me?  No?  Maybe you should keep it that way, really.
Well, after viewing this movie for the first time (yes, I've watched it several times), I came up with a t-shirt made from a photo-shopped pic of Miss Lohan wherein I chopped off one of her hands.  (That sounds really sick, but....actually I guess there's no but about it: it is sick.)  This is a drawing of the t-shirt image.  Or most of it.  Obviously the image on the t-shirt is accompanied by the words Lindsay No-Hands.  I'm quite proud of that.

Eureka!

Because this isn't cheesy at all.

It's like magic

Apparently I have a problem

I stole this from another photo Peter took.  Of me actually. 
Wow, that's TWO problems:  I plagiarize and I'm vain.  I clearly need help.  And probably less hoosier art supplies.  I used my eye liner smudger thing for the shading and to smooth stuff out. 
What, you ask, was I staring down at in the original photo?  The crumbling ice of a small campus lake, melting in the warm promise of an impending Spring. 
And that's why I don't write poetry. 

Blatant Plagiarism

This photo is of a photo Peter took.  With a Post-It stuck on it.  I like this photo a lot and I do not feel I have improved on it at all.  Well done, Peter.

Tattoos

This is the tattoo on my back (there is in fact another button under the Post-It in case you were wondering).  I would very much like to have more tattoos.  But they're expensive and I am poor.  I'm also tired.  Goodnight.

Nobilo Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc 2010, of New Zealand

Of which I have had most of a bottle.  Very fruity, almost champagne-like.  I most definitely approve and recommend to others who enjoy a fruity white wine. 
Throughout said consumption I have viewed (in part): Prince of Persia (dumb), Royal Wedding (a classic--and Peter Lawford, too!), The Pajama Game (also a classic but oh so stage hammy), Chicago (a quality contemporary musical--screw Moulin Rouge!), There's No Business Like Show Business (if you only knew the drama going on behind the scenes), How to Succeed In Business Without Really Trying (FAN. TAS. TIC.  Nothing else to it).  I'm thinking I may move onto Meet Me In St. Louis (one that I've never really been especially fond of despite my being a native St. Louisian) and/or Charade (I cannot express how entertaining this film is, but you know what I'll try:  Audrey Hepburn.  Cary Grant.  Walter Matthau.  James God dammed Coburn.  Stanley Donen directed.  What is there not to love??)
So this Post-It is what's known as a DOODLE.  My sister has a particular talent at doodles that I did not inherit.  But this is day one. 
Bonjour April!